Parents are Floundering in the Backwash of the Pandemic.

Family has been one of the things that has brought us all closer together during these strange and unsettling times, at least that is the image portrayed in the media.

Behind the by now rather weary tropes about the trials of schooling and the self-consciously cute imagery of the family that bakes together staying together another and less comforting picture can be seen. One of parents who feel lost and confused and children who have been damaged, maybe permanently, by the events of the past few months.

This is something highlighted by a YouGov survey of 2000 parents carried out for the charity Action for Children. The survey found that a third of parents said they felt 'out of their depth' when it came to helping their children cope with the aftermath of the pandemic.

A third of the parents who responded said their children had talked about feeling isolated and anxious, this had impacted on their own mental health with 43% reporting that they too felt anxious.

Nikki Willis (32), a mother of four who took part in the survey talked about how the  'uncertainty of everything ' has had a negative impact on her own mental health and  that when her children asked her questions 'I just don't know any of the answers and can't reassure them about anything '.

The effect of lockdown and the uncertainty that has followed on her children had, she said, been equally damaging. Macey (8) had gone from being 'a quite spirited, happy child' to bring 'a little girl who isn't interested in anything'. Even her eldest daughter Katelynn (10), who 'usually takes everything in her stride' has ' started to struggle'.

During lockdown Action for Children saw a 415% surge in the number of contacts made to its online support services. In response the charity has launched a new Parent Talk website to offer advice to parents who are struggling.

Lynne Giles, who manages the Parent Talk service said ' the pandemic has triggered a crisis for Mums, Dads and children on an unprecedented scale', adding that 'huge numbers of children will need extra support over the coming months and parents are telling us they don't know where to turn'. This, she said, meant a service like Parent Talk was 'needed now more than ever'.

Even as restrictions, for the moment, are starting to be relaxed many parents are fearful about the long-term impact on their children's mental health. The YouGov survey found that 37% of respondents were worried their children would struggle to socialize and were fearful of encountering people outside their immediate family. They also reported a higher incidence of bed wetting and behavioural problems.

Action for Children warn that the situation is likely to get worse as the long-term impact of the pandemic on the mental health of the nation as a whole becomes clear.

There lies the run of a problem that could be with us long after COVID-19_has been relegated to the history books. The children who have had their young lives mauled by this crisis will grow up to be the generation that truly shapes the new normal, because they will have known little else.

A society created by people who have grown up feeling that anxiety and uncertainty are the norm is at risk of being a stiflingly conservative one. When our collective confidence has taken a serious knock, it is human nature to retreat into the comforting bubble of convention.

Economically that is dangerous because it discourages the innovation necessary for success and prosperity. On a social and political level of could be downright dangerous, opening the door to  darkness.

Dictatorship thrives when people are afraid because it purports to offer them comforting answers and easily identified scapegoats. It fears and does all of can to stamp out democracy because it empowers people to ask tough questions of themselves and the society in which they live.

Childhood is when we learn to recognize the things we fear and how to walk with our fear in order to live meaningful lives. That is why the government must put protecting the mental health of children, and adults too, at the heart of its recovery plans.

Despite the best efforts of Prime Minister Boris Johnson to do his Tigger routine to cheer us all up, the pandemic will not be over by Christmas; more to the point its shadow will be on us for decades.